The Top Eleven Things You Will Never Hear In Heaven

11.  Three’s a crowd.

10. Sorry, this isn’t my table.

9. At the tone, please leave your name, number, and the time you called.

8. Paper or plastic?

7. This is a test, had this been a real emergency…

6. No personal checks accepted.

5. Three out of four doctors recommend…

4. http://www.anything

3. No shirt, no shoes, no service.

2. This program contains mature subject matter and may not be suitable for younger viewers, parental discussion advised.

1. Will work for food.